What is Self-Confidence? Self-confidence is about trusting your own judgement and feeling comfortable with your abilities and powers: it’s the means to realise your full potential and be the person you want to be. This trait allows you to feel secure in the world and encourages others to feel comfortable around you, as your behaviour is reliable, and they know what to expect. Self-confidence comprises various factors, including how you present yourself physically to the world and how you relate to other people. Healthy self-confidence can bring benefits to all areas of your life, but if you have low self-confidence, getting help from a top counselling psychologist in Chennai can be a big Help for low self-confidence.

How is self-confidence different from self-esteem?
Self-confidence differs from self-esteem, and although the two terms are used interchangeably, some differences can impact finding a way forward. Confidence is linked with the external world and how others see us, present ourselves, and achieve. Self-esteem, however, is more about our own relationship with ourselves and how we feel deep down about who we are.

Confident people set realistic goals, learn useful skills and undertake tasks to achieve aspirations. People with low self-esteem are often unable to set realistic goals: they’re conscious of ‘never being good enough and compare themselves unfavourably towards others.

The two traits match but not always connected. A person struggling with self-confidence and self-esteem might be particularly successful and confident at work but is acquiring these skills to compensate for a deep feeling of low self-esteem. This compensatory need drives many high achievers, but often the hoped-for sense of satisfaction for their low self-esteem evades them. This then causes them to overwork or seek refuge in some other area. So, self-confidence can evolve alongside self-esteem or independently.

We can develop self-confidence through realistic goal setting and planning. However, it’s important to note that the pressure you or others put on yourself to live up to expectations can lead to anxiety and bruised confidence: developing self-confidence at the right pace for you is key.

We hold ourselves to impossible standards. Wherever we may have got it from, the media, our parents or our peers […] "It’s our job to break the cycle."

Visible Signs
Your self-confidence level is visible in your body language, your behaviour, how you speak, and how you react to different situations. Self-confident people are generally more positive and believe in their abilities, whereas those with low self-confidence often have negative thoughts about themselves and their abilities. This leads to a downward spiral of under-achievement and disappointment.

If you have low self-confidence, you may feel:

you are unsuccessful
you have no drive or direction
shy and uneasy
a sense of uselessness and worthlessness
inferior to others
bitter about work, social and family relationships
Confidence doesn’t have to be solid across all areas of your life. It’s important to assess this to understand that learning and skills are developed to bridge confidence. Maybe you’re confident with one or two close friends but not with big groups. It may be that you’re confident with animals or children, but not with adults. You may be able to cook but unable to sing. Confident people build on what they can do and confront honestly what they lack, accepting constructive criticism and support.